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Topic: The "Jokes" Thread (all the jokes and funny pictures go here) (Read 27442 times)
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Jim Hickson
CWO H.J. Hickson, MMM, CD. (Retd)
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Hi Tim
lololololol
Jim
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1961-Depot San Lenorado
1962-1st Bn RCR Ex Gagetown
1962-JR NCO Course Grad 19 Oct
1962-1965 Germany B-C-D-A Coy (Revecated Nov 64)
1965-1967 Sigs Pl Cyprus Prom CPL 'til xmas and C of Drums
1967-1973 Cpl, MCpl, Sgt, Sigs, D Coy
1973-1977 CFOCS Chilliwack Prom WO
1977-1982 UEO, Sigs, Pl WO RECCE, CSM B&A Coy,
1982-1984 SIT School
1984-1988 Career Manager (Prom CWO 1986)
1988-1990 RSM 1RCR
1991-1995 CWO Adm(Per) - C Of S
1995-1999 Base CWO Wainwright
1999-Retired
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Jim Hickson
CWO H.J. Hickson, MMM, CD. (Retd)
Ultimate 2000+ Member
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Hi Don
I won't go hunting in Nfld lololololoolololoolololol
Jim
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1961-Depot San Lenorado
1962-1st Bn RCR Ex Gagetown
1962-JR NCO Course Grad 19 Oct
1962-1965 Germany B-C-D-A Coy (Revecated Nov 64)
1965-1967 Sigs Pl Cyprus Prom CPL 'til xmas and C of Drums
1967-1973 Cpl, MCpl, Sgt, Sigs, D Coy
1973-1977 CFOCS Chilliwack Prom WO
1977-1982 UEO, Sigs, Pl WO RECCE, CSM B&A Coy,
1982-1984 SIT School
1984-1988 Career Manager (Prom CWO 1986)
1988-1990 RSM 1RCR
1991-1995 CWO Adm(Per) - C Of S
1995-1999 Base CWO Wainwright
1999-Retired
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Gerry Connors
Veteran 500+ Member
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(Optional) Your Text here.
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From ol friend, Linda England
A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around.
If he stopped, she stopped.
Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout,
and she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease; it's just that you like my late son."
He answered, "That's okay."
"I know it's silly, but if you'd call out "Good bye, Mom" as I leave the store, It would make me feel so happy."
She then went through the checkout, and as she was on her way out of the store,The man called out,
"Goodbye, Mom."
The little old lady waved, and smiled back at him.
Pleased that he had brought a little sunshine Into someone's day, he went to pay for his Groceries.
"That comes to $121.85," said the clerk.
"How come so much ...I only bought 5 items.."
The clerk replied, "Yeah, but your Mother said You'd be paying for her things, too."
Don't trust little Old Ladies!!!
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1RCR Duke's Coy '82 - '87; Cyprus '84 / '85
LOTPed medic 1988; CFH Halifax '88 - '90
119 AD Bty medic, CFB Chatham '90 - '95
2RCR medic '95 - '00; SFOR Bosnia, 2RCR Roto 4 '99;
42 Hlth Svc Gagetown '00 - '02
CFRC Gagetown / Fredericton '02 - '06; 'retired' Aug '06
HMCS Jolliet, Sept-Iles QC, medical staff / 'tiffy' (reserves)
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Don Marche
Ultimate 1000+ Member
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A woman sitting in a restaurant in St. John's, NFLD
suddenly began to cough while eating a giant lobster.
After a few seconds it became apparent that she was
in real distress.
Two men, Bob and Bill, sitting at the next table
turned to look at her.
"Kin ya swaller?" asked Bob.
The woman signaled 'No', desperately shaking her head.
"Kin ya breathe?" asked Bill.
The woman, beginning to turn a bit blue, shook her head 'No'.
With that, Bob walked over to her, lifted up the back
of her skirt yanked down her panties, and ran his tongue
up and down the woman's butt crack.
This shocked the woman into such a violent spasm that
the obstruction flew out of her mouth and she
began to breath again.
Bob swaggered back over to his table and proudly took
another drink of his beer.
Bill said in admiration, toasting Bob,
"Ya know bye, I'd heard of dat dere 'Hind Lick Maneuver,' but
I ain't never seen nobody do it."
Don
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1964-1965 RCR Depot North West Canada Pl,
A Coy 2 RCR London
1965-1968 B Coy 2 RCR Fort York Germany,
Promoted to Cpl 68.
1968-1973 D Coy 1 RCR London,
Promoted M\Cpl 69
1970 Cyprus
Promoted to Sgt 73
Took my release in Sep 1973 Rank Sgt
Pro Patria
SSM, Peace Keeping, UN-Cyprus, Queen's Jubilee, CD1
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Jim Hickson
CWO H.J. Hickson, MMM, CD. (Retd)
Ultimate 2000+ Member
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Hi Don
lololololololololololololo lolololollololoolololololo llllooooollllooollolololol oll
Jim
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1961-Depot San Lenorado
1962-1st Bn RCR Ex Gagetown
1962-JR NCO Course Grad 19 Oct
1962-1965 Germany B-C-D-A Coy (Revecated Nov 64)
1965-1967 Sigs Pl Cyprus Prom CPL 'til xmas and C of Drums
1967-1973 Cpl, MCpl, Sgt, Sigs, D Coy
1973-1977 CFOCS Chilliwack Prom WO
1977-1982 UEO, Sigs, Pl WO RECCE, CSM B&A Coy,
1982-1984 SIT School
1984-1988 Career Manager (Prom CWO 1986)
1988-1990 RSM 1RCR
1991-1995 CWO Adm(Per) - C Of S
1995-1999 Base CWO Wainwright
1999-Retired
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Jim Hickson
CWO H.J. Hickson, MMM, CD. (Retd)
Ultimate 2000+ Member
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Gender:
Posts: 5286
Pro Patria
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Hi Don
Holy S@IT!! You talk about those Neufies!!!
Jim
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1961-Depot San Lenorado
1962-1st Bn RCR Ex Gagetown
1962-JR NCO Course Grad 19 Oct
1962-1965 Germany B-C-D-A Coy (Revecated Nov 64)
1965-1967 Sigs Pl Cyprus Prom CPL 'til xmas and C of Drums
1967-1973 Cpl, MCpl, Sgt, Sigs, D Coy
1973-1977 CFOCS Chilliwack Prom WO
1977-1982 UEO, Sigs, Pl WO RECCE, CSM B&A Coy,
1982-1984 SIT School
1984-1988 Career Manager (Prom CWO 1986)
1988-1990 RSM 1RCR
1991-1995 CWO Adm(Per) - C Of S
1995-1999 Base CWO Wainwright
1999-Retired
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Ghalsey
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Wal-Mart has everything!
>>>>>>
>>>>>> One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike
>>>>>>behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a
>>>>>>doctor."
>>>>>>
>>>>>> "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike
>>>>>>replies.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> "There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give
>>>>>>it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong
>>>>>>and what to do about it.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . . . A lot
>>>>>>cheaper than a doctor."
>>>>>>
>>>>>> So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it
>>>>>>to Wal-Mart.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks
>>>>>>for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and
>>>>>>waits.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:
>>>>>>
>>>>>> "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and
>>>>>>avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you
>>>>>>for shopping @ Wal-Mart."
>>>>>>
>>>>>> That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology
>>>>>>was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine
>>>>>>samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good
>>>>>>measure.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He
>>>>>>deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the
>>>>>>results.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> The computer prints the following:
>>>>>>
>>>>>> 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle
>>>>>>9)
>>>>>> 2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal
>>>>>>shampoo. (Aisle 7)
>>>>>> 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
>>>>>> 4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a
>>>>>>lawyer.
>>>>>> 5 If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will
>>>>>>never get better!
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart
>>>>>>
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Geoff Halsey 1 RCR 1981 - 1991 Fin 831 - 1991 - 1996 CD, UN Cyprus  |
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